One Heartfelt Wish

October 14, 2009 12:00 AM

Dear G4, Cartoon Network/Adult Swim, MTV, and VH-1 executives,

Please stop. Stop trying to be normal networks and go what back to what used to make you great.

MTV, you’re the oldest and worst offender. I swear MTV stood for “Music Television”, not reality shows and low-budget programming for and by attention whores. What’s wrong with music videos? It’s not like you don’t have 30 years worth of videos to work with.

Same goes to you, VH-1. “I Love the _______” was great, but you used up that capitol when the no-name skanks Flava Flav turned down started getting their own spin-offs.

Cartoon Network/Adult Swim, I’m addressing this to you for fear of what I know will happen. It started out with late night crap like “Tim and Eric” and “The Mighty Boosh” that was on too late for anyone to see, but now you’re putting on reality shows for kids? Just tell Craig McCracken and Genndy Tartakovsky you’re sorry and everything will be just fine. Oh, and try showing classic anime on Adult Swim sometime instead of just licensing whatever trendy show comes along. Anime’s been around for a long, long time now. There’s a lot of shows that I imagine would do just as well on your Saturday night slot as the 30th re-running of “Kagome Gets New Shoes”.

And G4- you hurt me worst of all. You and I used to be perfect for each other: video game programming during the day, and anime at night. It was magical. Now I can turn the channel to see Cops at any given time, and no one in the hell knows when X-Play even comes on anymore.

I don’t hate you, G4- I just hate what you’ve become.

Please come back to me,

-The Busboy

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The Chef

Don't forget....

October 14, 2009 07:48 AM

Do not forget another offender: SciFi (or "SyFy", as they decided to call themselves now). Professional wrestling? It may be fiction, but it's not science fiction, or even speculative fiction at all - it's a bunch of steroid-bound meatheads with the acting skills of Pauly Shore pretending to smack each other around. And the retarded phonetic name change...perhaps they were afraid the "Sci" part might remind viewers that there might be a hint of intelligentsia on the channel, however unlikely that may be with the "original" movies they run all the time.

All of that, however, is almost made up for by Warehouse 13.

The Maitre d'

In all fairness...

October 14, 2009 08:46 PM

... I've heard good things about "The Mighty Boosh." Apparently it's edited down from an hour, plus it's British humor or something, so not all of us get it. Also, I saw an episode each of "Look Around You" and "Darkplace," and they were kind of funny in a quirky sort of way. But yeah, live action should take a back seat to animation on principle.

G4 I have no respect for. They apparently decided that having a lock on the teen-to-20-something male gamer niche wasn't good enough, and that they needed to capture the entire teen-to-20-something male niche. So, they gave up being the beautiful love child of Wired and Nintendo Power, and instead became a crappy version of Maxim or SpikeTV, with a few tech/gaming shows thrown in for old times' sake.

I'm probably a hypocrite for complaining, though, since I barely watch TV at all.