You’ve got to admire Eliot Spitzer.
Yes, you read that right. This man is my new idol, joining the Holy Trinity of Gavin McLeod and Nathan Fillion as someone I want to model my life after (not that either of those men are anything like Spitzer). For those of you not keeping up with the current rumor mill, let’s just say that Mr. Spitzer has gotten himself into a bit of a pickle with the public due to some recent actions involving hookers and public funds. There is, of course, the usual hue and cry and outrage that’ll be forgotten in two weeks when the next celebrity scandal comes along.
The truth is, you’ve got to admire Eliot’s audacity. The man truly has some balls (the metaphorical kind, not the physical kind he used on the prostitutes – although he would have to have those, considering he was a regular customer and all), and ginormous brass ones at that.
There’s an old adage that goes, “If you only have a hammer, everything must look like a nail.” Beyond its implications about what tools do to one’s eyesight, the adage speaks to us about what we do and how we do it. If you can only do one thing, do it better than anyone else. Eliot Spitzer’s hammer is corruption, and he excels at it.
You have to admire his dedication to the art of public office. His commitment to excellence meant that he not only stole public funds, but was so utterly without morals or conscience that he went out and blew those public funds on whores. That’s a work ethic not seen since the Nixon administration, when the President secretly taped himself to see if he was going to say anything incriminating.
I can definitely get behind that (and I’m not even Frank Miller). Patronizing whores is kind of the epitome of moral decadence. Not only was he cheating on his wife, but Spitzer was paying a woman for sex. Not only that, but he was doing it on the taxpayers’ dime. Eliot Spitzer is The Man.
As I mentioned before, whatever you do in this life, you do it to the full extent of your abilities. Eliot Spitzer has taken that adage to a whole other level. He has proven himself to be a king among public officials, and a man among men. I salute his dedication to excellence.